Self Love The Inner Work

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The year was a tough year for all of us. With the onset of COVID-19, many people were forced to drastically change their everyday routines: working, school and weekends from home, with socializing and other activities put on a long hiatus.

As we’ve entered 2021, we’ve seen a semblance of return to “normal”, with altered activities to still account for social distancing and safety requirements. Though we are making our way back to our day-to-day activities from before the pandemic, many are still feeling isolated and experiencing struggle in their relationships with themselves.

Self love is key - we have to be okay with being alone with ourselves, and liking the person we are. Here are some tips to loving yourself in 2021:

1. Accept Yourself For Who You Are

Chances are, there are some things you would like to change about yourself: maybe you don’t like your laugh, or you wish you didn’t have so many freckles. Whether it’s something big or small, most people have things they wish they could change.

Though this is a common and understandable feeling, it should not be your norm - learning to accept yourself for who you are is the first step to self love. It can be hard to find the beauty in the things we don’t like about ourselves, so instead, learn to accept them for what they are. These things, in addition to infinite others, are what make you, you!

1. Believe In Yourself

Self doubt is the number one enemy to self love. If you are constantly doubting yourself and your abilities, you create a self-fulfilling prophecy: believing you are incapable of overcoming obstacles in your life or accomplishing things will make it far more difficult to achieve your goals. 

Overcoming self doubt can be difficult, but not impossible - remind yourself of your capabilities, past accomplishments, and how much you’ve grown when you feel self doubt rising. Looking back on your accomplishments will give you the motivation you need to reach new heights.

1. Surround Yourself With the Right People

Have you ever heard the phrase “you are who your friends are”? Though it might sound strange, often it holds true - who you are and the type of life you lead will often mimic those of the people you surround yourself with. 

This is why it is critical to get in with the right kind of people: liking your company and the kinds of people they are will automatically help you to like yourself even more.

What’s more, surrounding yourself with good people who have similar life goals to you will motivate you to work towards becoming your best self. As you continuously work on yourself with the support of your friends, you will find it is easier to love yourself as a result.

1. Avoiding the Wrong People

Surrounding yourself with the wrong people, on the other hand, can be near detrimental: there are people who have no ambition, or simply do not want to see you succeed. Some people may seem like they’re your friend at first, or have your best interest in mind, only to reveal their true selves later on. If you have a friend who constantly talks about how they want you to succeed, but acts rudely to you when you accomplish a goal, consider that friendship carefully and see if they truly support you when you’re doing well and not just when you’re doing badly.

Choosing not to be in toxic relationships, whether platonic or romantic, can be difficult when it involves a person close to you or someone that has been in your life for a while. Remember that how long you’ve known someone is not an excuse for them to act poorly: a good friend is a good friend no matter how long you’ve known them. If you find some people in your life do not seem to be lifting you up, but instead bringing you down - consider distancing yourself from them. 

1. Know Your Worth

Knowing you are worthy - worthy of a good life, worthy of happiness, and worthy of success - makes it easy to learn how to love yourself. You deserve to be happy, and you deserve to have a life you enjoy living. Understanding that you deserve good things in life will help you make the right decisions for yourself: knowing when to leave a bad job, how to cut out a toxic friend, or simply how to advocate for yourself comes when you know your worth. 

You’ll notice after continuously making the right decisions for yourself, you will allow yourself to thrive - and, in turn, you will love yourself for the effort you put into bettering your life for you.

Overall, self love is critical to a better life. When you prioritize yourself, including your physical and mental health, you will find happiness and success comes easily. Know that you deserve to be loved, and give yourself that love: you will be amazed how quickly your life improves.

Some of us have not taking the time out to love ourselves. The overwhelming desire to feel that sensual touch of our desired person and the need to be accepted can be two contributing factors of feeling a sense of codependency n the presence of that significant other. 

Some of us have not taking the time out to love ourselves. The overwhelming desire to feel that sensual touch of our desired person and the need to be accepted can be two contributing factors of feeling a sense of codependency n the presence of that significant other.